The urge to yell and curse.

Yeah, I know.
I've got a lot of explaining to do about my
"for-awhile-abandoned" blog.
But actually, I was about to upload those unposted entries but before I could do so, I lost it.

God, I'm so thankful I'm such a calm person.
I really thank the Lord.

I wish I hadn't read that mail.
Really.

Anyway, I just hope that things between US will be fine, sooner.

God.

About those entries, don't worry I'll post them sooner. Promise

June 25, 2006
UP, Like No Other School

Im loving my school more and more.
Weird, but true. The past few days have been totally sad but somehow, UP and being in that wonderful university made feel…relieved.

Whenever I walk down along those old corridors, I feel free.
Whenever I see those trees, those really green trees, that line the streets make me feel fresh.
Whenever Im with several people from different walks of life, I feel belonged.

Whenever Im in UP, I feel like I’m much different person from the old and boring me.

I feel a little braver.
A little tougher.
(If only that feeling would last a lifetime)

Im so thankful I got into that most prestigious school ever.
Yeah, so thankful.




June 30, 2006
Help.

And I dont want the world to see me,
Cause I dont think that they ll understand.
But when everything s made to be broken,
I just want you to know who I am.

I feel so scared. I feel so troubled.
I could not stop my mind to worry even about the smallest things.

What am I supposed to do? I believe in you but
I have a lot of fears. Please, hold me. Dont let me fall.